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It's never comfortable to read, or even think, about grief. And Love Never
Dies is many things--eloquent, sweet, touching, and powerful--but it is definitely
not an easy read. Sandy Goodman has taken brave steps past Kübler-Ross's
work (On Death and Dying), and here she challenges us to open ourselves to
a different set of stages that she labels numbness, unrelenting pain, searching,
and reinventing. She writes with comforting openness about pretending that
she was progressing through the standard stages, was "getting over" the
death of her son, and was searching for a more clearly defined faith. She
also is frank about the real need to continue acknowledging birthdays as
well as the anniversary of death, and provides a few specific suggestions
for friends to help those going through grief, such as asking, "How
are you really doing since [he] died," instead of merely, "How
are you?"
Each chapter closes with a short message in bold print, written from the point
of view of Goodman's dead son, Jason. She clarifies in the introduction that
this is not channeling or automatic writing, merely her best guess as to
what he might have to add to her own thoughts. Regardless of your point of
view on these additions, it is clear that Jason is continually present to
his family.
Having someone you love die, whether expected or unexpected,
is perhaps the most trying, and painful situation we face
in life. In her book Love Never Dies, Sandy Goodman walks
right past all the analytical, psychological lingo to, as
John Edward, renowned psychic medium put it – “light
a path of understanding through the darkness of loss.” Sandy
Goodman has turned her personal journey following the tragic
death of her 18-year-old son into a valuable guide destined
to help all people who are dealing with grief over a lost
loved one. Blending reality, personal experience, and compassion,
Sandy advises the reader not to try to return to their “old
selves,” but to find a way to be comfortable with their “new
self.” This book is a thoughtful gift.
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